Bizarre bonds

imageSo there’s this thing that happens in Montgomery every several weeks and there’s a siege of new people who come for officer school at the military base. Last Friday when I went out I ran into a group downtown, exchanged numbers with one of the officers and have been chatting since. We’ve been bonding over being recently single. We basically connected over feeling screwed over. It’s actually been a really great distraction and a nice friendship.

When the debris settled down, turns out being single again isn’t as scary as it seems. I felt betrayed, but I think it showed me how fragile I am and I might not be as strong as I’ve always wished and hoped. But I read a great quote tonight: “obstacles are a gift from the universe. Fall down and get up stronger.” I was complaining about the universe, but you know what, easy doesn’t change you. I’m always looking for balance, but maybe I’m supposed to be imbalanced? Maybe I did dodge a bullet, but maybe the bullet struck me and there’s another lesson to be discovered. Maybe this had to happen to reveal I have a structure here in Alabama that’s coming together?

Yesterday I went on a road trip with two other trainers from my gym to Atlanta. We got instructor certified in Kettlebell AMPD,  but what I loved the most was going through the training with them. The whole car ride, the 8 hour course, getting lost, gossiping, it really made the entire day fantastic. I’ve noticed when I’m grieving I have a greater appreciation for those around me. And it makes the betrayal and other bullshit look like another drop in the bucket of experiences. This positive outlook doesn’t stem from me though. Having the opportunity to love George taught me valuable life lessons. He was a gentle, kind, caring man who saw the best in people. I saw how he maintained strong relationships with those who reciprocated those genuine feelings too. I believe deep down, seeing how he handled his cancer, his treatments, friendships, family, career, dreams, aspirations has offered me a lifelong understanding of valuing love, trust, and everything that is wrapped up in relationships not just romantic but friendships too.

Okay now here’s a side note of being single again. Tonight I was approached to be “taken care of.” I was asked to be a sugar baby to a sugar daddy. I wished him a goodnight and Bodie and I walked home. I should’ve asked if he had a house in Wynlakes… Missed opportunity. Good news is I definitely still got it. Bad news is, this single life will be bizarre.

About J.

Fitness professional, fitness & nutrition writer, widowed at 28. Writing about getting through grief through self-care, physical activity, and the ​constant feeling of being uncomfortable.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Bizarre bonds

  1. What a beautiful blog! My first time visiting and I’ll definitely return to backread your posts. You have tremendous spirit and a way of generating it outward…..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s