In 10 days the memories of November 25, 2013 will creep back. They’re submerged but slowly those thoughts are ascending. Tiny bubbles of memories are percolating and I just feel a little helpless. How can you combat your brain? These memories just don’t vanish. They’re there to haunt me for a lifetime. I remember today he went into the hospital two years ago, only to return back to me on November 19th in out patient hospice care. Two years ago I was laying beside him in Memorial Sloan Kettering on a hospital bed. I fell asleep on his left shoulder because he was hooked up to IVs on the right side. When I left him to go home, I remember texting my best friend to meet me in midtown to grab food and drinks. I stood at the corner of 34th and 5th Ave crying because I didn’t know what was happening. I got home 2 years ago today to a dark apartment in Jersey City, and had to let Bodie out. I just remember believing George was going to be okay. I thought he was going to get out of the hospital the next day. I never believed he was going to die in 10 days.
And that is liver cancer.